


Go Get Him

by Imasam



Series: I Wrote a Sterek Fic and Didn't Know What To Do With It [3]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Based on a Tumblr Post, Diary/Journal, I promise it's not bad, It's kinda sad, M/M, Mentions of Eating Disorder, There's a cute ending tho, based on a gif, mentions of cutting, mentions of depression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-02
Updated: 2016-07-02
Packaged: 2018-07-19 17:40:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,217
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7371352
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Imasam/pseuds/Imasam
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everything for Stiles goes to shit after Derek leaves and he doesn't know what to do about it, so, he writes it all down in a journal.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Go Get Him

**Author's Note:**

> I was asked to write a one-shot based on a gif and this is what I came up with.  
> It's kinda sad and kinda sweet and I kinda like it more than most of my pieces.
> 
> https://secure.static.tumblr.com/f17db9dcbb9e36cd3483a6af451d8fdd/labun9d/mSWnuc6f3/tumblr_static_tumblr_static__640.gif

**_March 20, 2015_ **

Six months. Derek’s been gone six months. He left with Braeden, out of all people, Braeden. I actually don’t mind Braeden but like, he left? FOR HER? Like, I kinda thought we were getting somewhere before all hell broke loose.

Derek and I had even gone on a few dates. Everything seemed good, until it wasn’t. And now, I’m suffering through my senior year without him and our pack is actually falling apart. Nothing is going okay. I also think I’m losing my mind again, no biggie though. No one will notice. Scott’s happier when I’m not around, I’m just dead weight lately, I drag the pack back when I try to help and with the Dread Doctors we can’t really afford that. So, I sit home, alone, and do research, and more research, and so much research that my eyes might melt out of my head and soak themselves into the keyboard if I stare at my computer screen much longer. But, I’m too scared to sleep so what else am I supposed to do? I’m actually ahead in my classes now. I haven’t been this good in school since before Scott got bit. My dad’s happy though. I guess that makes it better.

But, I’m not happy.

Derek didn’t even say goodbye to me. He doesn’t answer my calls or my texts. I’ve even tried contacting Braeden and I get nothing. I just give up. If he doesn’t care, I shouldn’t either, right?

 

**_March 26, 2015_ **

The days pass in a blur now. I wake up every morning (on the nights I actually get an hour of sleep or two) and I go to school. The pack either ignores me or isn’t even there. Coach wants me on first line, only because most of the team is never at school and the rules state that you have to be at school the day we have a game or you can’t play and not because I’m actually good enough to make first line but why would I expect that?

i’llneverbegoodenoughatanything

 

**_March 31, 2015_ **

I told my dad I made first line. He thought I was joking.

I quit the team.

Coach didn’t even care.

 

**_April 12, 2015_ **

I called Derek today. He actually answered and it’s the only good thing that’s happened over the past month. He told me he misses me. I doubt it, but it made me smile. He asked about the pack. I lied, I told him everything was great. That we got some awesome new members. That nothing bad was going on. I didn’t mention the Dread Doctors or how I killed someone or how Scott hates me or how I hate me. I didn’t tell him anything. I didn’t want him to feel like he had to come back to fix things. He’s already dealt with too much in this town.

But, I miss him.

God, I miss him.

 

**_April 27, 2015_ **

Lydia stopped me in the hall today. She asked me how I was and got mad when I told her I was fine. She looked disappointed, like she knew. Like she knew how much I hate myself now. Like she knew that I would press cold metal to my skin and watch the crimson fall down against my pale flesh on really bad days. Like she knew that I haven’t slept a wink in the past week. Like she knew that my thoughts were tearing me apart and I would sit in the shower and cry with music playing just to drown out the noise and keep my dad from over hearing, from asking questions.

She hugged me. Said she was here for me. She kissed my cheek and told me to come to the next meeting.

I don’t think I’m gonna go. Nobody wants me there anyways.

 

**_May 9, 2015_ **

Isaac came home. I told him everything that happened. He said he went to see Scott first but the story didn’t make sense to him so he came to get the truth and to see how I was. He said he believes me, that we’ll figure out a way to get through to Scott, that if Scott heard the real story he’d understand. He’d apologize.

I don’t want an apology.

 

**_May 15, 2015_ **

Derek called me today. Asked how I was. I lied again. I think he knew but he didn’t push it. He told me about Cora, how she met up with them, some of the fun things they’ve been doing.

I told him I miss him.

I shouldn’t have told him. He doesn’t care. He left me.

 

**_May 18, 2015_ **

Today had been such a long day. It was good and bad and I’ve cried more tears than I knew I even had. I saw the pack today, Theo wasn’t there. Isaac arranged it so I wouldn’t have to deal with him as I explained everything. Scott apologized, he asked me why I didn’t just tell him that in the first place. I asked him why he never gave me the chance to.

 

**_May 20, 2015_ **

I’m finally becoming pack again and not just someone that the pack uses when they need me. The Dread Doctors are taken care of. Everyone’s safe, as safe as you can be in Beacon Hills anyways. I told Derek about the Dread Doctors, about Scott, about me.

He believed me before I even finished explaining.

But, maybe that’s for show.

 

**_June 1, 2015_ **

Derek’s called me every day. He apologized for not calling more before, they were busy. I didn’t really expect him to call though, he left for Braeden. Or at least I thought he did. He said that they weren’t dating, that he didn’t leave for her. He left to get answers. Something about his mom and being able to change into a full wolf. He knew his mom was able to but he didn’t understand why he was. Why he evolved.

He said he wished he never left but he needed to.

He asked me to stop hating myself so much and when I asked what he was talking about he said Isaac told him about my scars and skipped meals and sleepless nights. Told him how I wasn’t actually okay and he said didn’t know what to do, nobody did.

I told him I was fine.

He told me he loves me.

 

**_June 24, 2015_ **

Derek came home today. I walked out of school after our graduation rehearsal with Scott, Isaac, and Lydia. He was standing with his back facing us in the grass by the parking lot. I felt my heart beat so fast I’m surprised it didn’t break through my chest and fall to the ground.

I looked over at Scott, he smiled and muttered ‘go get him’ nodding his head toward the older male. I took a deep breath before I started walking toward him, my pace getting faster the closer I got to him, eventually breaking out into a sprint. He turned around and smiled at me. I jumped toward him knocking us both to the ground.

“God, I missed you so much.” He said into my neck.

I felt a sob break through me, “Don’t ever leave again.”

“I’m right here, babe. I’m not going anywhere. I promise.”


End file.
